What does it mean to live on hopes and dreams?
I have been a dreamer since I was very young. I could keep myself entertained for hours just sitting with my own thoughts and imagination. A word, song, picture, or even a simple sound could take my imagination to far off places. I wondered what I would be when I grew up and I remember feeling so excited about my prospects. I wanted to be an artist, a dancer or a fashion designer.
Out of all the things I wanted as a career, Artist was at the top of my list and more than anything I wanted to go to school for it. Reality hit me though when I got older and I was told I needed to pick something “more practical.” I grew up in a poor family and they wanted me to grow up and have a stable life where I wasn’t just trying to scrape by. Ironically, that’s exactly what ended up happening, but that’s a whole different story. So, they would tell me to pick something safe, something practical and at the time I felt like I had no other choice than to follow their advice.
I couldn’t think of anything else I wanted to do, artistry was it for me. I needed color, imagination and the freedom of creative expression. I ended up with 20 or so years of experience in customer service and about 15 years specifically in Administrative work. I know… Boring, but it pays well and has, mostly, kept a roof over my head. In 2015 I decided to divorce the husband I never wanted to marry and… Again, that’s a whole other story, just know being a people pleaser doesn’t pay…
Where was I? Oh, I finally left the ex husband and made my way over to Montana to try and make a new life for myself. It’s been 8 years of the craziest roller coaster ride I have ever been on. Holy Hell did I learn a lot about people around me, myself and life in general.
One of the things I learned though was to stop living life by other people’s rules. Perhaps if I had the courage to fight for the career I wanted despite what my family thought, I’d be living the artist life right now or maybe not, who knows? I do know that if I had more of a backbone when I was younger I never would have got married, but I had a lot of childhood trauma and have decided to give myself a break on that one. The important thing is, I’ve learned to have a backbone and I’ve learned how to stand up for myself and my dreams, but let me get back to my point.
Today, while talking to my sister, she reminded me how she and I are the best at living on hopes and dreams. We took a lot of chances, but even in the down times we never gave up hope for our future. No matter what anyone’s opinion might be, we let them have it but lived our lives according to ourselves and no one else. It feels empowering and magical to have that much control over our own lives. I hope whatever you may be going through or if there are people close to you who don't believe in your dreams, don’t lose courage. There’s always gonna be someone out there, aside from yourself, that does believe in you and today that person is me! We really can do whatever we set our minds to, you just need the gumption. Don't get me wrong, it's a lot of hard work, but it's entirely worth it.
Do you remember Bob the Builder’s “Yes, we can!” chant anytime there was trouble? I always thought it was a bit annoying, but he still had a great way to keep himself going. LOL Hey, if it works then use it right? Whatever your dreams or aspirations are, please don’t give up on yourself. Don’t be like me and waste years of your life pleasing other people. YOU and YOUR happiness are important too! Much love and blessings to you!
*JEN*
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